One of Those Days...

Have you ever felt like you are failing at your job as wife/mom/housekeeper?

I sometimes do...when I look around and see the piles of laundry needing to be done, or it’s another Tuesday night at 6pm and suddenly I realize I have put no forethought into my supper menu...or perhaps I’m feeling extra tired and I lose my temper with one of my kids, rather than dish out a second (perhaps third) dish of patience. Then there are those days when every interaction I have with one or more of my kids seems like a power struggle or teachable moment gone terribly wrong...the days when I have exhausted every single disciplinary measure up my peanut butter encrusted sleeve.

This has been one of those days.

I know people who paint a lovely, controlled picture of their life as a Mom...trying desperately to cover up the wild brushstrokes underneath that tell the true story of frustration, exhaustion and guilt. I can’t help but feel deeply sorry for them. While it’s sometimes easier on the ego to deny you have these kinds of days or feelings...it’s also cathartic to admit that you do.

Realizing that other moms are going through similar things in life usually frees me to release guilt and move on, because honestly, what mom has the time or energy to carry around that burden? We are already packing around our weight in diapers, burp cloths, wipes, snacks, toys and extra sets of clothing! Not to mention the fact that we really do need to get to those bathrooms...like I said, there’s no time for guilt!

All this to say - I try to cut myself some slack on days like this. More importantly, I’m learning that these are the days when it’s really important for me to connect with one of my Mom friends...and blow off the guilty feelings before they get the best of me – or my children.

I am so blessed to have friends, family and a supportive husband around me who can step in with the encouragement I need to pull myself up off the cheerio-encrusted floor and take another swing at the wild pitches life as Mom occasionally throws me. It is surely not a job one can do in isolation, is it?

These past nine months have put an ocean between family, friends and me...and I am beginning to feel the full effects of it. While this season of our life has been so rich in many areas, it has also lacked a few key things. Community is one of them. My husband and I are both coming to a new realization of how important it is for young families to be in community. We remember fondly those of you who rallied around us so faithfully at home, who took a turn in raising our kids and shared in this amazing journey. We miss you and want you to know we love and appreciate you more than we can ever say. We wonder if we sometimes took your support for granted.

So the lesson for today is this: If you have those people around you who are your go-to people...the ones who keep you real, accountable and sane on this journey of motherhood: take a minute today and let them know how important they are to you. Encourage them in their role as a supporter! And more importantly, if you don’t have those people around you...do something about it. Reach out, change circles, do whatever it takes to surround yourself with these kind of people. Take it from me, you need them.

And if you’re having a day like I am, cut yourself some slack! You are doing one of the hardest jobs there is, and you know in your heart you do it well. Days like this serve to remind us we are human...and in my opinion, no human can succeed at motherhood without a little supernatural intervention.

Speaking of which, since I’m already face down on that cheerio-encrusted floor, I think I’ll spend this time on my knees wisely.

And no, I’m not talking about scrubbing the floor.